#3 Connecting

Once you are in a conversation you need a connection, otherwise you WON’T GET A RETURN TEXT OR PHONE CALL.

With connection I don’t mean a cable connecting to a technical device. Well actually that might be a very good bridge to explain to you, how to connect with a girl (or any other human being) on a meaningful sincere way. Picture the male part of a cable being put into the female part of a electronic device. BOTH HAVE DIFFERENT SHAPES BUT FIT IN PERFECTLY TOGETHER!


To create a connection you need to know who you are


For that to happen you need to know YOUR SHAPE. I am not saying: decide if you are male or female, but decide who you are WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE and what you want from girls. Casual sex, flirt, fun… (I will post more about that in my Self Improvement section- Make sure to jump in the practice)

So in the First Page #1 Opening I talked about how to Open, i.e. how to start a conversation with a group of people. Now it is time to reveal secrets on how I build UNIQUE AND FUN CONNECTIONS with women I am interested in. And expose  some real life cheats on how to hack into social dynamics.:




First of all I can explain things this way. When you meet a woman, you need to start a conversation in which the topic is something she would remember you by. Something you could text message her later about, without signing your name and she would know who you are. Think about that….

IT IS NOT HARD TO BE WHAT THEY WANT!!! And women don’t want these programmed robots coming over with pickup lines and having the entire conversation in their heads. While I do admit this is more advanced stuff, I urge you to strive to become YOUR BEST SELF on your journey. Once you listen and bounce of each other you instantly build a connection easy as that. So ONCE YOU HAVE ONE FOOT IN THE DOOR WITH OPENING ,ALL YOU NEED TO BE AN ACTIVE LISTENER.

e.g. In the supermarket a girls  looks at ice cream. You walk over and draw a ‘tick tack toe board’ onto the condensation of the freezer. And say:

” Oh man I took the middle square. Now it is your turn…”



The last time I did that, in this super quiet supermarket the girl burst out laughing and we played the game… (No matter what you do in life you need to push boundaries, the faster and willing you are to bust you balls sometimes to more successful you will become in whatever you do.)





Well you are taking the wrong approach buddy. There are no scripts… I just LISTENED TO WHAT SHE SAID. Found out, she loved playing board games and actually confessed that she was in a chess team when she was 8 years old. Well guess what we did on the next date…



You see the problem is that when she says all these things but I didn’t hear it because I was thinking what can I say funny next. I AM FUCKED. You know what it is not about what to say funny next . Because she is going to tell you the WORLD if you listen!! She will let you into her world. Because the fact is, if you look at eDarling.com etc. women want guys that listen. Try it out ! For some reason every woman gives you a clue on where the conversation can go next. Even in the first sentence she talks to you.


R: Hi, you just look like someone from Berlin, do you have any idea how I can get to X. ( underlined words are advanced seeds you place in the conversation that are threads women can attach to and you can take it from there..)

Girl (from Berlin): Haha. Yeah I am from Berlin, take the Bus #234. (And then the magic starts to work.)How do people from Berlin look like?


Girl: Haha. No, I am visiting Berlin for a Weekend. I just got back from the Octoberfest in Munich (They really give you easy clues like that.) But I think it is…



Girl: I just got back from the Octoberfest in Munich (Which is your clue)
R: No way u where in Munich, where were u exactly?
Girl:Starnberger see. 
R: I love s. seee. what is u r favorite part in munich and why?
  • When they say something get really animated and excited (for that you need to lsiten)

BAM connection starts to build.

#2 Locations

When you go up there and you observe you can do things based on your own personality because you go to places you are already comfortable at. If you are not comfratble  in a bar, why the fuck would you want to go there?

In order to connect with people you should go to places you are comfortable at. Love sports? How about meeting women in a fitness studio. Love books? How about the next book signing of a famous author. Naturally a conversation and connection builds up. And when you text her later with something like “… after today I decided to become an author…” she knows that this has to be you. Because you have a connection.

#4 Observe

Observe and then comment on things she is wearing. Sometimes you need to calm down and just check out their earings, chains, hats etc. these are amazing connection and conversation starters…

#5 Eye contact 

The Mona Lisa










Look at them and make them melt.

  • Don’t break eye contact look directly at them.

Basically you want her to think : that guy really likes me (a dragon i am fighting against and working on to expose my  interest directly to a grils). Because you know than when your smiling and looking at them. That is seduction! I mean WE ALL KNOW WHEN A GIRL IS INTO US. But we don’t trust ourselves enough because we dont listen enough, because we don’t lsiten enough and we didn’t have enough encounters (training) to know the difference. So in the begingin you must take chances and practice.

I mean if you talk to a woman and dont look at her and look around the room to check out if there is a better opportunity for you in that room or stare at a nice round ass walking by how does the girl feel… let me flip the script: Imagine a girl talks to you and while you talk to her, she looks around the room, taking glances at other guys. How would that make you feel?


In conclusion the connection you want to build with a girl HAS TO BE PLAYFUL AND LIGHT. Why? Well why the fuck would you not want to have fun with someone. And usually it is people that are fun to hang out with that you want to see again. Think about it… (Fun and funny are 2 different things. While the fun implies being comfortable and having a good time, funny means you constantly crack jokes…)



1. Be in places you are comfortable at

2. Be creative in the way to start a conversation

3. LISTEN to what is said. And forget planning the entire conversation (you can trust me on this or try it out and after 2 years come back and read this again…)

4. Know what you want


Next Post I will talk about the transition from building a connection to getting a girls phone number. I will also talk about direct and indirect approaches. And talk to you about my favorite and cherry on the pie: banter. (A conversation that is simply a exchange of crazy sentences based on fantasy and without real purpose) 🙂



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